I’ve pondered a lot of questions lately.
What am I doing in life? Am I really aligned with what I want to be doing? How can I contribute greater good to the society and my community at large?
These questions have left me with pen in hand, ink slightly drying on paper as I struggle to find answers. I feel like my notebook is full with half answers, that I’m on the cusp of discovering what is is I’m supposed to do in life. I’m left wondering if what I’m doing is just settling (and I know it is, just by the feeling in my gut). And the more I fill my journal with words and thoughts, I start to see a common theme emerging.
What is that theme?
That I love to write. That I’ve been honing and practicing this craft for a while now and I have found my voice. I enjoy describing perspectives that come from interactions, community and observing others. We all have something to teach and I love the process of exploring what makes other people tick and then sharing my discoveries with others.
This weekend I met a guy who works at Burning Man. He had a spark in his eye and an aura about him that was undeniable. He sat with Benjamin and I for several minutes and described his involvement – as a groundskeeper and grid cultivator. He described Burning Man boiled down to his own perspective: to ultimately help others. BM allows action to take place and those involved become engrained in the process. You don’t just sit and watch – you take part. I wanted to know more. I wanted to ask him a million questions. But we were at a party and he had a fire to tend to.
That conversation sparked something within me. I’ve started jotting down my curiosities, the questions that float around in my mind as I pedal for miles and miles on Boulder County’s back roads. I use my phone to record my questions and then revisit them later to research answers. I’m no longer stuck in the loop I was before, one that had no end as those questions would float in and out of my consciousness. Now I capture them, give them life on paper and then followup. What I decide to do with that information then becomes a choice – share the knowledge, file it away for recall at another time or discard it.
I looked up Burning Man this morning. It’s a gathering that has grown from a handful of people when it first started to 70,000 people strong worldwide. It gathers a group or people, focused on 10 core principles and creates a sense of community, exploration, creativity and networking.
I’ve also been reading “Die Empty” by Todd Henry. It urges does to do. To stop settling, and start moving. To take action and live and work as if today is all you have. And if you do, then you’ll be able to lie your head down each night satisfied with your work and in the end, you’ll die empty of regret but full of satisfaction for a life well lived.